"Don't worry about it! You can always do IVF."
"You still want kids after you've seen mine?! You can have them!"
I'm pretty sure that every couple who has dealt with infertility and shared this information with others has heard insensitive comments from friends and family. I really don't think they say these things to hurt us intentionally. Usually, they are trying to "help" with their unhelpful or uneducated advice - but their intention is to help.
Given that, I've written an article -- for your friends and family -- on 12 things not to say. Please feel free to share it with those who know about your infertility. Heck, if you're "out" about your infertility, share it on Facebook or Twitter, so more people will stop saying these things.
I think we've all managed at one time or another to put our foot in our mouths (I know I have!), and if you frequently find yourself sick with foot-in-mouth disease, check out this awesome compilation of what-not-to-say's on a variety of conditions.
What's the worst thing someone said to you? What was the most supportive? Tell us in the comments below, or share your experience here.
More on friends and family:
- 10 Things to Stop Doing if You Want to Support Someone With Infertility (For your friends and family.)
- How Can I Support a Friend With Infertility? (Another for your friends and family!)
- Cultivating Support When Facing Infertility
- Coping With Unwanted Advice
- Should You Tell Your Friends and Family About Your Infertility?
- How to Deal With Pregnancy Jealousy
- 5 Ways to Be an Awesome Aunt
- How to Deal With Baby Showers
- "When Are You Going to Have Kids?"
- Coping with Family Dinners
- 10 Ways to Cope When Trying to Conceive Overwhelms You