Getting your period when you’re trying to get pregnant is rarely easy. I suppose there are people out there who don’t feel disappointment when they get their period while trying to conceive, but I’ve never met anyone like this. Here are some tips to help you cope. They helped me, and I hope they help you.
Schedule Some Grieving Time
It’s completely normal to feel sadness and frustration when you get your period while trying to get pregnant. But you don’t want to be feeling that sadness and frustration your entire period.
It can help to schedule some time for sadness. You might tell yourself that you’re going to get out your tears and pouting out on the day you get your period – but on the second day of your cycle, you’re going to do your best to move forward.
If you’re still feeling the sadness on day two, don’t just push it aside. Instead, you can “schedule” maybe 15 minutes during the day for letting out the tears. It sounds weird -- scheduling your emotions -- but this actually can help.
Save Extra Special Self-Care Treats for Your Period
Menstruation is a great time for extra self-care. You might save some special herbal tea for this time, or scented lotions or soaps. Light some candles, dim the lights, and spend some time drawing, knitting, or doing whatever hobby you have that you enjoy.
While there’s a stronger temptation to gorge on junk food during your period, you’ll probably feel better if you make yourself a healthy, feel-good dinner. You might decide to make one of those meals that take more effort than you normally have time to spend, but tastes great and leaves you feeling good. For me, that was always roast chicken, quinoa, and a veggie filled salad, topped with homemade dressing.
I’m not saying you should deny yourself chocolate completely. I’m quite the chocoholic myself! But it’s too easy to eat tons of junk food when you’re feeling sad, leading to feelings of regret later. The tasty-feel-good dinner trick has helped me get past junk food temptation many times.
Invest in Cloth Menstrual Pads
This may sound a little weird, but investing in cloth menstrual pads helped me cope during a miscarriage. I figured if I had to bleed, I was going to bleed in style. They made such a difference in how I felt. Plus, they are more comfortable than disposable pads!
Avoid Pregnancy Test Regret
Though tempting, taking multiple pregnancy tests during the two week wait before your period is late does not make getting your period any easier. Once you do get your period, you may regret wasting the tests and throwing away money on them.
- When the Pregnancy Test Is Negative: What It Means and How to Cope
- Coping with the Two Week Wait
- Before You Take a Pregnancy Test
Talk to Someone About Your Disappointment
Perhaps the only thing worse than feeling depressed when you get your period is feeling alone with your sadness. Don’t keep it all to yourself. Call up a close friend who knows about your trying to conceive troubles, or vent here on our fertility forums.
You might also consider seeing and speaking with a professional counselor, especially one with experience with infertility clients. Speaking to a counselor helped me find a way to get through two week waits, disappointing periods, and stressful fertility treatments without feeling like I was drowning.
- Quiz: Are You Depressed?
- Find a Therapist
- Signs of Infertility-Related Anxiety or Depression
- RESOLVE Support Groups
One last thought -- though your period signals the end of one cycle, it is at the same time the beginning of a new cycle. I know the idea of yet another cycle can also feel overwhelming. However, a new cycle still means a new chance, a new hope – and maybe this period will be the last one for the next nine months, followed by that dreamed for baby.
More on coping while trying to conceive:
- How to Cope When Trying to Conceive Overwhelms You
- 10 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself
- How TTC Affects Your Sex Life
- How to Cope During the Two Week Wait
- Emotional Impact of Infertility
- Coping with Fertility Test Anxiety
- How to Have a Baby When You've Been Trying for Awhile
- Take a Fertility Quiz
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